Elder & Midgit

What set me off here, oh yes,  I know,  the description of a senior citizen conference I am going to attend later in the month:  "Celebrating 25 years of being positively ageless!"   My sons  (they were about 6) were at a power intersection in Minneapolis,  Hennepin and Lake.  Great place to watch people,  and (bingo!) an ancient man walked across the cross walk,  undoubtedly going for a bus there.   Cane in hand,  bent over,  legs in questionable shape,  my boys couldn't get their eyes off of him. 

Well,  he decided to honor their stares with a description of his age,  one that was honorable,  had taken some beatings getting there,  but with the help of his trusty cane still mobile,  thank you.  I don't think to that date they had ever seen anyone as old,  certainly not with his mobility.  They kind of smiled,  I (as I recall) thanked him for his understanding, and we went on. 

Later, however,  in a different cross walk at the same intersection,  A & A saw a midget woman and, again,  couldn't get their eyes off of her.  She came at us,  struggled up on the curb, and ask "what you little son of bitches are looking at?"  They kind of shrunk back,  said a few apologetic words, she wished us a "good day"  and went to her bus stop.   I had seen her before and was to see her again,  this intersection was part of her travel routine and as I went to the Post Office storefront and a store there fairly often she was a part of things.   I don't think the boys saw her again,  and if they had it might have been "interesting" to see how they handled it.

Well, back to the e l d e r l y & our coming celebration.   Another memory to share and I will close this.   On Geary St. in San Francisco when in and out of there I frequented a sailor's bar.  There was an ancient crone who came in to cage drinks and flirt with us.  She dressed like a gypsy,  and often challenged us to food races down the block for drinks.  Unless you were hopelessly drunk it was quite easy to beat her,  but often we let her win as part of our understanding of the dynamics of the situation.  Now,  why (I ask) isn't if OK to not be "positively ageless,"   to show and enjoy the bumps and grinds you have been through in your life?   It seems to this old duffer that that is perfectly acceptable,  perhaps much better than even trying to be "ageless!"

Baby Talk and Cutesy

I have been put off my entire life by baby talk,  the talking down to someone,  especially children and elderly people;  and especially with a change of voice tone,  plus attitude.   Cutesy talk is the reverse side of the same "coin,"  and is equally disgusting in my view.  I may be wrong,  but my feeling is that this is especially endemic with the so-called "Boomer"  generation,  although I know it goes back far before that generation became so dominant in our society and will undoubtedly be an influence in other generations extant and to come.

It may be that I am a little oversensitive as an eighty year old,  because I am a prime candidate for such talk and attitude.  And I have watched/listened in horror as I've observed "care givers" indulging in this stuff with people I know.  One of my dear friends has the added complication of forgetfulness and dementia,  so that people caring for him seemingly do not have to be cognizant of any insults which may be given to him via their attitudes (!).

Thinking about this for myself,  I discovered a kind of parallel problem when trying to speak with people in other countries in their language,  or in a simplified version of English. You want to "get through,"  but (and I can remember several very insulting incidents to this day) then found that either the person I was speaking with was fluent in English,  or was offended that I subjected them to what amounted to baby talk in their language.  

Thinking back to my own family,  I never remembered my Father or Uncles baby talking to my Grand Mother Nellie Mae in anything close to baby talk.   The same goes for Grand Father Roberts,  although he didn't live to a "ripe old age," and thus be potentially subjected to such talk.   As for my Father and Mother,  I don't remember them being subjected to the baby nor the cutesy either.   Can I ask the dear reader of this to be careful in this area of speech?  Thank you, much appreciated.